always the frens that know u best

i laughed out loud over yamcha session one day with some buddies that i grew up with
although after secondary school, we each moved on to do other stuff
but we still meet up if i go bk hometown, say 4 mths once?
ths are frens that still know me d best.

so back to the story...
i was laughing so hard...my frens were silent. they were shocked.

"its been so long since we last heard you laugh"

i went bk that nite feeling very down.
i know my frens sense that im not happy & they are worried.

me? im also thinking..."when was the last time i truely laughed?"

i guess its time to rethink n ponder on life n its purposes.
i hate letting others worry abt me. hate that feeling. feels incompetent.